Wednesday, December 14, 2005

It Stings

I've told myself time and again that I'm so over him. And I know I've managed to come to terms with certain things in my life but last night the subconscious part of me cried.

Yesterday was not particularly a smooth sailing day for me because of all the knitty gritty details of trying to co-exist with the people from around here. So I'm so darn sure that never did this person cross my mind yesterday. Earlier this morning, I woke up crying because in my dream he made this announcement that he will be settling down soon and that he is inviting me over. It was like a blow in my gut and I hated myself for even feeling that way.

They say our subconscious mind tells us more about what really lurks in our hearts. Oh I will let the world think that way. There is not a thing I can do to make the world change their minds but I'm in control of my feelings and that is what I'm going to harp on. Maybe I will hurt if there is some truth to what I dreamt about but life as it is goes on so I know I will find a way to stand up and say, "I'm glad that once in my life, I have loved this man."

Monday, December 05, 2005

Easy & Difficult

Easy is to judge the mistakes of others
Difficult is to recognize our own mistakes

Easy is to talk without thinking
Difficult is to refrain the tongue

Easy is to hurt someone who loves us.
Difficult is to heal the wound...

Easy is to forgive others
Difficult is to ask for forgiveness

Easy is to set rules.
Difficult is to follow them...

Easy is to dream every night.
Difficult is to fight for a dream...

Easy is to show victory.
Difficult is to assume defeat with dignity...

Easy is to admire a full moon.
Difficult to see the other side...

Easy is to stumble with a stone.
Difficult is to get up...

Easy is to enjoy life every day.
Difficult to give its real value...

Easy is to promise something to someone.
Difficult is to keep that promise...

Easy is to say we love.
Difficult is to show it every day...

Easy is to criticize others.
Difficult is to improve oneself...

Easy is to make mistakes.
Difficult is to learn from them...

Easy is to weep for a lost love.
Difficult is to take care of it so not to lose it.

Easy is to think about improving.
Difficult is to stop thinking it and put it into action...

Easy is to think badly of others
Difficult is to give them the benefit of the doubt...

Easy is to receive
Difficult is to give

Easy is keep the friendship with words
Difficult is to keep it with meanings.

and last but not the least ....

Easy to read this
Difficult to follow.

Heading Home

Was it just the other day when I was packing my stuff and getting ready to go back to Jakarta? And now I'm counting the days when I can head home and be with my family again. They said we are where we are now for all the right reasons. Nothing happens in this life that is not a part of the bigger picture. So my being away from my family has its purpose. And just like every bird who has been set free there will always be a time when it would long to be home again.

That is exactly what I'm feeling right now. I want to go home. This time around I intend to spend more time with my family; doing things I miss the most while I'm here in Jakarta.

I was just wondering how will the pinoys spend their holiday this time around. So many things have changed this year. Whenever I talk to some of my friends back home, all I could hear from them are the saddening news on how tough life is in RP. But even if I hear only the bad things about my country, RP will always be a place I can call HOME because this is where my heart is.